Pushing Forward and Often

“Be the change you want to see in this world.” ~ Gandhi
 
This is a powerful and moving quote... essentially a wake up call to take full responsibility for your life. Here Gandhi tells us, in order for us to see changes, we're the ones who have to actively change first... do not complain, criticize or theorize from the 'safe' place, because it's not only weak, but brings no growth, and personal development is all about growth.

When you think about growth and personal development, just think about beautiful flowers and how they become what they are. In order for them to grow bigger and better, sometimes the growers cut off the tops.. topping or pinching.  This has been shown to cause plants to invest more of their energy into flower growth and less into seed production... the expected result is flower buds that produces higher quality flowers.  And I believe this is true for personal growth as well... the core purpose of this article. Even if you produce satisfactory results in certain areas of your life, it can be helpful to cut them off and discard them, freeing up energy for stronger and higher quality results elsewhere in your life.  Otherwise you just find yourself settling into a comfort zone of satisfaction with the old results.

It can be difficult to cut areas of your life, because you did produce results, but if you don’t cut, then you can easily stunt your future growth.  You will be essentially causing the much needed energy to be invested in seed production around your old path. When you refuse to cut, you are basically saying things are as good as they will ever be and you settle. If that's you, fine, but if you want purposeful growth in your life, then topping is a necessary practice.

Below are some ways to drop the merely satisfactory in your life and strive for stronger, bigger and better quality personal development and growth.

1. Don't let your life become too stagnant... mix things up now and then. Drop old routines and try something new for a while. Stop investing energy in maintaining your old routine, even if it works and you like it.  Doing this will free up more energy for exploration and growth. Go out more, have new experiences, meet new people... explore, learn, and grow.
2. Refuse to be stuck in a rut... even in a seemingly good place. When you stay relatively still for long time, you put down seeds and as time passes, these seeds develop stronger and stronger roots, making change more difficult. The longer you stay still, the more people will relate to you based on your current position.  And, this may be familiar, but your thoughts and feelings become repetitive, circular and as time passes, little is changing in your life.
3. Comfort zone - begone. Once you notice your life becoming a little too comfortable, you're in your comfort zone. If you like the comfort zone and wish to stay there, that’s your choice, but growth and personal development demands change, so don't get stuck there for too long.  The next time you feel your life becoming a little too comfortable... where you  just relax yourself into the satisfaction of maintaining the status quo... break free of that reality and go for more growth. Take a class, go for that promotion, travel, run for an office... grow.

Stepping outside of your comfort zone can yield a lot more growth than staying stagnant. Explore and learn each day, even the minor victories are stepping stones to growth and development. So drop the merely satisfactory by topping it off and invest that energy for a stronger, bigger and better quality of life.

The Inner Path: Living Spiritually, Daily

"Everyone is on a spiritual path; most people just don't know it." ~ Marianne Williamson




Spirituality, for many people, is a simple yet sacred act of connecting with something greater than oneself. It's a deep sense of belonging to life and finding it meaningful on every level. It's coming into the right relationship with ourselves so that our inside matches our outside... our values and dreams show up in how we actually live our life. And when we're in the right relationship, we feel a sense of joy, peace, meaning, and being comfortable in our own skin. It feels like a type of homecoming (ever been away for a while and returned home, wow)... a kind of belonging. You get it, I know you do. So how do you put your spirituality into practice. 

Here are three quick relationship qualities embodied in a spiritual life that you can practice and directly apply to your life, daily and make a difference to your overall health and wellness.

Nutritionwise: Get Fired Up for Some Meatless Monday Grilling

These Meatless Monday Grilling Tips

 Will Fire You Up for a Healthy BBQ Season

As you fire up your BBQ throughout the summer, instead of the typical meat-focused fare why not cook up some grilled veggies instead? Vegetables are amazing on the grill, plus meatless grilling is an easy way to add vitamin-packed, healthy seasonal produce to your diet, which can help reduce your risk of certain chronic diseases. So get grilling and take a break from meat with these 10 easy summer grilling tips:

1. Many vegetables can be thrown right on the grill with just a light brushing of olive oil (with delicious results)! Fresh corn, tomatoes, asparagus, eggplant, zucchini, squash, bell peppers and jalapenos are just a few to try.
2. Kabobs are a BBQ staple that make the perfect meatless entree. Add tofu cubes, cherry tomatoes, mushrooms, roasted potatoes or just about any other vegetable that strikes your fancy.
3. Grilled fruit is amazing too. For a sweet side dish or dessert, try peach halves, pineapples, plums, melon, kiwi, bananas, pears or figs with a touch of honey marinade.
4. Swap a hamburger for a portobello mushroom burger or grilled eggplant slices. Put the BBQ’d veggies on a bun and add your favorite toppings, like avocados, caramelized onions, roasted red peppers or an olive spread.
5. Try a veggie burger recipe that celebrates hearty ingredients like black beans, lentils, quinoa and chickpeas. You can also find healthy pre-made patties at supermarkets and natural food stores.
6. Make a delicious, smoky pizza pie right on the grill — all you need is pizza dough, sauce and your favorite vegetables thinly sliced or pre-grilled.
7. Use your favorite marinade recipe to add flavor to extra firm tofu cubes. Grill them up and add them to a salad, serve them with veggies or enjoy them on their own.
8. Add grilled vegetables to a filling summer salad. Garnish fresh lettuces with a bit of fruit, feta cheese and olive oil to complete the dish; or think beyond lettuce and whip up a bean or grain salad.
9. Consider your sides when planning a meatless BBQ. Pasta salads, raw vegetables and hummus dip are great ways to turn your plant-based dishes into a full meal.
10. End the meal on a healthy note with a tray of fresh fruit, a parfait or homemade smoothies.

Looking for even more great summer grilling ideas? Sample some of our favorite meatless burger ideas in our free online Monday Burgers Cookbook.

Personal Development: "Be All In and Give It All You've Got"

 "Most people never run far enough on their first wind to find out if they've got a second. Give your dreams all you've got and you'll be amazed at the energy that comes out of you." - William James

If you want to succeed in anything you do, you must be all in.  It applies to everything you do. Give it everything you have, heart and soul. Whether it's in a team environment, in business, your significant other or spouse, but most  importantly, it really all begins with you. So, what do you have to do to be all in and give it all you've got?

1. Commit yourself. You must make a commitment to your goal, team, the people involved and the outcome.  Just having a passion or desire is not enough.  A desire is a want and that's it, just like a passion.  We desire, along with being passionate, all the time. But, how many of those desires or passions have you actually followed through on or acquired?  Wanting something is not enough and it certainly doesn’t mean being all in or giving it all you've got.  It’s more than words, wants or desires; it's a promise.  People of integrity and real leaders keep their promises, therefore honoring their commitment.
2.  Hold yourself accountable. True accountability can only come from you.  You're the only one who can hold you accountable.  And to make it work, you must allow others to hold you accountable as well.   Success is never found on your own, it always takes other people to help in one way or another.  If you're not willing to be held accountable to the commitment you have made or for what you have to do or say you're going to do, then you're not really all in and you're not giving it your all... it's that simple.
3. Be dependable. Being consistent with your word shows, not only others that you're trustworthy and dependable, but yourself too.  When people stand in support of you, they know they can count on you to do what you say you're going to do. You build trust with them. It's like this, if you can't count on someone to follow through, then you learn very quickly you can’t rely on them and you will foster little trust in them and eventually you won’t waste your time on them, right?  Well, that's how it is with you too... it's a two-way street! Be willing to be all in, because those that are all in will to have leave you behind if you're not dependable. They will not give up their commitment to achieve their dream for one who can’t give it their all.

What you really need to know by being all in or giving it all you've got, is that you can't quit or stop because things get rough or life becomes difficult and gets in the way.  There will always be excuses or reasons that can get in your way and stop you from doing anything, if you let it.  This maybe a good time to change you thoughts, behavior or attitude before you begin justifying your lack of commitment.  Your actions or lack thereof, will always speak louder than words.  Remember no one finds success on their own, help from other people is always needed, some way, some how.  There's no such thing as a self-made millionaire. So know where you're going, enjoy the journey, be all in … and give it all you've got all along the way.

Dare to... Fail, Then Dare to Succeed

“Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.” ~ Robert F. Kennedy 

 

We all know that nobody likes to fail. But let's face it, whether it’s a job, a marriage, or a close friendship, failure is inevitable and can be devastating, but it’s how we learn.  We need to realize that it’s natural to fail... yep, as natural as breathing.  We may not always enjoy it, but it teaches us how to navigate through life. But at the same time, if you don’t take big chances or if you're not giving it your all, then be static and don’t expect anything big in return. If you’re scared to fail then you’ll never really know what you can achieve.  So take a look at some of the reasons many people fail to succeed and then at some ways to navigate through them to get you back on the track to being successful and achieving your goals.

Fearful No More

Most people are fearful of what others think, that’s why some don’t dare to take the necessary chances needed for success.  But if you’re willing to give your all for what you honestly and authentically believe is a good cause, then that’s when you can expect something in return.  Some fears are real and should be respected, but fears that are exaggerated and unfounded keep really keep you from truly experiencing your life and becoming fulfilled.  But at the same time you have to be ready to accept that you will not achieve it every time. The only way to achieve great things is to push yourself to the extent that you can’t any more. You have to aim for goals that don’t seem that easy to reach and be willing to admit to yourself that you really want these things that will not be easy to get.  Use your failure as an antidote to empower you with the ability to learn from your fear.

Comfort Zone Be Gone

It’s easier to settle for small things than bigger ones when you don’t want to fail. Failure does not feel good and a lot of people don’t want to risk that. However, if you do not risk failing, you cannot achieve anything that is outside your comfort range.   And the more attached we become to a particular outcome, the greater the disappointment when things fall apart. But if you stop trying new things, or only allow yourself to do what you’re good at, the life you lead may not look like the life you want.  Perhaps it's time to stretch those limits a little! By stretching your comfort zone, not only will your life become more exciting, but you'll also build confidence. Focus on the joy of doing something and not on the anticipated outcome. If it works out, great and if it doesn't, shrug it off and keep moving... next!

Give Yourself Permission to Fail

I get it,  you think your self esteem might drop or you might feel humiliated or embarrassed, but give yourself permission to fail, then “dare to succeed”... even if that means being sloppy, taking risks, or slipping up, because excellence comes from experience, and experience often comes from failure. It’s important to remember that failing at one thing, no matter how big, doesn’t make you a failure and that learning how to cope with smaller disappointments, like doing poorly on a test or getting a bad work review, can really help you when faced with truly difficult times. Failing can also encourage you to reflect on whether you’re on the right path, sorting out what’s working and what isn’t. Failing is a learning process... it's a journey.

Be honest with yourself and know that people make mistakes.  An Albert Einstein quote says, “Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.”  So take a deep breath and know that you're imperfect, (everyone is), therefore your actions will be imperfect. Realize also that it’s NOT natural for you to go from point A to point B in one swift straight line. It’s natural for the journey to be all over the place, at first, but with time, it will get smoother...  as long as you make corrections based on the feedback you get.  So fail, then dare to succeed. Things in the beginning will not look straight at all, but as time goes on and your experience grows, you'll see your successes... so dare to... fail, then dare to succeed.

The Inner Path: Watch You in Action

“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.” ― C.G. Jung

Are you self-aware? Would you know if you were? Well if you're still pondering about who you are, what your passion or purpose is, then you need to stop searching and get to know you better, because self-awareness is not a goal, but a continual learning process. The better you understand yourself, the better you're able to accept or change who you are. 

How you see yourself just may be clouded by the feedback messages you receive about yourself from others. But how could anyone know more about you than you? You're in the dark about yourself when you're continuously getting caught up in your own internal struggles, such as mental or emotional drama about your upbringing or you're allowing outside forces, such as the media, including social media, societal norms and the friends you chose, to mould and shape you.

• Self Awareness is having a clear perception of your personality, including strengths, weaknesses, thoughts, beliefs, motivation, and emotions. 

• Self Awareness allows you to understand other people, how they perceive you, your attitude and your responses to them in the moment.

But to answer the question Who am I?, you must first learn to become more aware of yourself. To be aware, you must stop and pay attention to you and the things you do. You need to actually stop and objectively watch and experience yourself in action... yes, watch you in action. Here are some ways you can become more self-aware.

• Be honest with you. Look at past issues you've had with people and see where you might have messed up.  To do this, turn the focus back to yourself and see if there was something you did to push someone's buttons, start an argument, or prolong a disagreement. 
• Listen to what you say. When you do find yourself in an argument with a close friend, listen closely to what you are saying... you might have done something without even realizing it. If the person seem hurt, ask them to share their frustration with you so you can learn. If the relationship is done and over, then go back over the attitudes you've had toward them.  This would be a good time to reflect on your actions and admit that you had a part in how others treat you. 
• Understand your role. Self-awareness is important in your interpersonal relationships, but you also have to balance it. Use the act of self-reflection to determine how your actions affect your friendships, manners and self-esteem.  Don't do it to act as a martyr or take the blame for everything. Balance it by understanding your role and acknowledging the things you do or did wrong.  Relationships are a two way street, but taking responsibility for your actions will help you keep a harmonious social life.

Self-awareness means that you're clued into to what you really enjoy and dislike. Making changes in your behavior is much easier to do when you catch hold to those clues early in the dynamic.  Before the momentum of emotion has gathered steam you want to stop the emotional reactions and develop meaningful communication and respect in your relationships. So watch you in action and create self-awareness... create you and know you.

Dare to... Reinvent Yourself

“Invent yourself and then reinvent yourself, don’t swim in the same slough. Invent yourself and then reinvent yourself and stay out of the clutches of mediocrity. Invent yourself and then reinvent yourself, change your tone and shape so often that they can never categorize you. Reinvigorate yourself and accept what is but only on the terms that you have invented and reinvented. Be self-taught. And reinvent your life because you must; it is your life and its history and the present belong only to you.”  ~ Charles Bukowski 

Reinvention means to change. It means taking something that's already here and making it look brand new.  It always amazes me when I meet people who are resistant to change. In many ways, that’s like being resistant to life itself. You see, life is in real time and by definition, that involves change. Many people go through a reinventions several times over their lives... leaving a job or a relationship, moving, losing a loved one, all signs that a change is needed, all major shifting in one's life, over time. We have to take control of who we will become or risk never reaching our full potential. But you have to choose reinvention.  You have to be willing to reinvent yourself.  Sometime the road isn't clear, but you may have to forge a new path deliberately and with vision. Don't just sit and wait for your future to find you because you could be waiting in vain, sadness and depression could set in or you could get tangled up in a bad situation.

You know you need to make some changes.  You know it's time, but you're having so much trouble moving forward partly because you have no idea what it is you want to move towards. You're stuck thinking about your past, when you should be thinking about your future. When you realize you're the master of your fate, and the captain of your soul, then you'll know that you and only you can control your future, instead of letting the pain of your past control you.  Here are three simple, but effective steps to help you reinvent yourself.

Dare to... Count Your Blessings

"The hardest arithmetic to master is that which enables us to count our blessings." ~ Eric Hoffer

To completely count all of your blessings that life affords you each and every day would be hard. There's just no way to do that.  But sometimes we are so busy that we forget to pay attention to the blessings that are present in our lives.  And there is no excuse for that. At least a few times a week, you need to remind yourself of your blessings, or you will forget they are there.  Most people have a daily 'to do' list filled with things they need to do for the day; problems that needed to be solved. So many problems that they never get around to counting their blessings. 

How about this. Your car won't start  You spill your coffee on your new skirt. You wanted to throw in the towel, drive home and crawl back in bed. You may be fed up to here. You may say that you have had enough. Every single thing that could go wrong seemingly did.  And that fed-uppedness spilled over into your whole day.  It all starts with one bad event and then it seems  to start a chain reaction...or so you think. 

You can turn things around. Realize that when you let that first unfortunate event push you over the edge your life has a tendency to spiral out of control.  Instead of just laughing about it and chalking it up to just another day in paradise, your day takes a turn for the worst and no amount of resuscitation can salvage it.  Its all about awareness, pausing and being attentive to all the ways you have been blessed. Use the three easy ways below to count your blessings.

The Inner Path: No Need For Disappointments

We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope.
Martin Luther King, Jr.

You're disappointed, again.  You failed your exam, your favorite sports team lost, you dropped your iPad, your heel broke.  Let's face it, your expectations were unfulfilled and the feeling of dissatisfaction that follows begins to manifest. You're angry, sad, hurt and fearful. You don't take disappointments well.  You just don't know how to deal with it and want to give in.  But don't let disappointments take a toll on you.  As the great poet and lecturer Dr. Maya Angelou says,  “If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude. Don't complain.” So just how do you overcome disappointments? Know that disappointment is temporal and hope is eternal.

• Disappointment is temporal.  It is what it is. It happened.  But know that every disappointment, however real it may be to you, is temporary and can always be overcome in time, along with the hurt, the fear, and the pain that accompanies it. Only your thought about it is permanent. So change your mind about what has disappointed you and you will change your life.  
• Hope is eternal.  There is always hope. Hope erases doubts, clears your vision and makes you far sighted. Hope promotes the belief in a good outcome of events in your life and that things will turn out for the best.  Hope always returns, continually.
  Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning is from a quote offering hope.
  

No disappointment is permanent and hope can sometimes persuade you to haste across the finish line even when you are tempted to give up. When there is hope there is life, for hope is the oxygen that fuels the spirit.  Hope infuses courage and provides you the momentum to keep moving forward.  However, no one or nothing is perfect and remember we would never learn to be brave and patient if there were only joy in the world. So remember this, there's no need for disappointment, even in the midst of it.... it is what it is.

Dare to... Believe In Your Dreams

Dare to...

"Risk, care, dream and expect." ~ Derek Davis

You've had a dream... a vision about your future, you like it, but have a hard time believing that you can really make your dream a reality?  The real deal is that you have to create that state of certainty where you believe in your dreams. You have to really know and feel that it's coming your way. So what do you do? Read on:

Dare to...

Write the vision; make it plain on tablets, so he may run who reads it. Habakkuk 2:2

“Always think on paper.” ~ Keith Cunningham

• Write down your dreams and visions. If you expect to achieve what you believe, then you must write it down. I mean using pencil and paper, erasing all doubt, by drafting and refining it until you get it to where you want it.