Personal Development: Be Your Own Cheerleader

 “Always concentrate on how far you’ve come, rather than how far you have left to go.” ~Unknown

You have to learn to celebrate yourself. We often freely praise others for their achievements yet withhold it from ourselves. So why do we find it so hard to praise ourselves when we achieve something? Well it doesn’t seem to matter whether our accomplishments are small or sensational, giving ourselves a pat on the back for a job well done is almost impossible for many. It could be, perhaps you were trained to be modest, hopeless or you simply didn’t learn to believe in yourself. Perhaps your past achievements were simply ignored by parents, peers or mentors and you’ve simply given up on expecting accolades.

Be your own cheerleader

However, if no one else recognizes the achievements you've made and the challenges you've come through, and you're waiting for someone else to pat you on the back, stop waiting for others. Learn to toot your own horn, without being boastful or arrogant about it, of course. Self-praise is important, more important than praise from others. Others are not always dependable. But, you can always count on yourself. So today, begin your journey of self-commendation. Correct your inner critic. You have to change the language of what you have been saying about you. Praise yourself for each achievement, however insignificant you may think it is. And don't concentrate on the things left to do, celebrate what you have accomplished. Watch yourself achieving as you go about your day. And give yourself a pat on the back... you deserve it. Five, six, seven, eight, who do you appreciate!

 

Personal Development: The Growing is in the Journey

 The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.  Lao Tzu

Sure, your goal is the desired result which you envisions, plans and commits to achieve an end-point in some sort of assumed development and deadline.  Now, that anticipated result is what guides your actions and gives value to your goal.  And, goals, even small ones are beneficial to follow, for they lay out a strategic path of short goals to achieve, rather than simply striving only for the thing you desire the most.  In order to reach your goal, you must embark on a journey and there lies the determining factor as to whether or not you reach your goal ... the journey, because each step counts.

~ It's because of the Destination  ...

To reach your goal, keep your mind on the destination, but focus on you path or journey you encounter along the way.  The journey is important because it's where you grow. You cannot get anywhere without moving. Without journeying through life, you stagnate and die. It's where you're tested. Planning your goals and writing them down is the safe part of setting your goal. 

The Inner Path: Try Being Your Own Best Friend

A good way to move forward in life and achieve purpose and success is to be your own best friend.  Being honest with yourself about your fears and insecurities, and on the need to always reach outside of yourself for completeness.  Not knowing how to handle it, you mask your true feeling in  habits or daily routines of materialism, criticizing yourself and others, using a friend to complete you, religion, more money, a better job, or maybe you escape into alcohol, drugs, more sex, TV, etc.  You may not have given this any thought, but many people seek happiness outside of themselves.  However, there's no true contentment unless it first comes from within. Even today's stresses and demands require a strong, solid sense of self - which is what being your own best friend is all about.  Instead of searching outside of yourself, have fun and enjoy yourself, alone.  Read the tips below to see how you can become your own best friend .

5 Tips to Becoming Your Own Best Friend.

 

1. Be positive with yourself: Develop the same kind of positive attitude and love toward yourself that you feel toward people whom you treasure as your friends. Give yourself uninhibited encouragement, kindly patience and unconditional support just as you give to others.  Forgive yourself when you make mistakes - and reward yourself when you do well. 
2. Don't be ruled by emotion:  Sometimes giving in to emotions are great when they help keep you from causing damage to yourself or others.  But, being ruled by emotions takes a heavy toll; feeling weak... rather than strong or self-pity... rather than self-respect.  Whether you are acting out of passion, anger or using knowledge to lead your feelings, it's up to you as to how to react. Feelings are not independent... we evoke them, and if we're mature, we choose how to act on them.  Make a basic decision and don't be a slave to you emotions.  Just remember, feelings change and don't last forever.
3. Watch how you talk to yourself:  Choose to lift yourself up and not put yourself down. How you feel about yourself is up to you, so if you don't like what you do....change it... if you can't change it....accept it with love, understanding and compassion. But above all, don't beat up on yourself emotionally.  Pay attention to the things you say to yourself, by keeping your intrapersonal communications, which is called "self-talk", positive.  And even when you make a mistake, don't call yourself names such as jerk, loser, fool or stupid.  You don't want this type of self-talk to become a habit, which could lead to low self-esteem.  The best way to break this negative self-talk is to immediately substitute a positive word for every negative one used.  Become a good, encouraging person to have by your side.
4. Meet your own expectations:  Set reasonable goals for yourself and meet them.  This alone will give you good reason to like yourself.  This is important because it'll encourage you to use positive self-talk....... I did a good job... I came through for me... I can count on me.  You don't have to wait on anyone to give you feedback or validation.  And, it can be any goal, small or large, maybe you washed the dishes, cleaned the room or balanced your bank statement.  The fact that you got the task done is a success.
5. Focus on the things you want to achieve:  Whether it's being a great artist, becoming a great dancer, writer or teacher, etc. Anything you want to do.... focus on that.  Don't let the fear of failure nor the fear of being alone or being own your own, stop you from moving ahead.  It's a frightening prospect - until you realize you can give yourself the comfort and sustenance you seek from others.  Be your own boss and get things done.

When you become your own best friend, do to yourself what you always wanted in a best friend.  You spend a lot of time encouraging others, now spend some time strengthening your relationship with you.  All the things you said to others, now say them to you and develop your inner awareness, self-esteem and develop your strong, solid sense of self...now.